It's Been A While...

"Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothings going to get better, it's not. So catch!"

Sometimes, its the friends that show you life in a different perspective that really matter most. you could look out A window all your life without seeing The Scarecrow in your neighbor's backyard. It only takes one sideways glance to hange that though.
I never noticed how much drama was consumng me. I preyed off of gossip and looks and what i should wear so i don't get called a freak. And i've also realized how even my best friends are the same way. In the longrun, i really don't care. All i need is a down to earth friend who can help keep me grounded. But living in the city with so many different cultures and opinions doesn't really supply that option often.
I've started to meditate lightly also, which has greatly inproved my sleep. That sounds very unimportant, but about 2 years back i had extreme insomnia and never really got back to normal. It takes the normal person 7 minutes to fall asleep, while it takes me about 30.
Through this meditation, I let my thoughts meander around possibilities such as what my life would be like if i lived in the suburbs, or on a farm. In my soul, i know i was meantto live on a farm or such. My love for horses and riding accentuated this, but it is mostly because I love being alone and being able to think and do my own chores. I can't stant it when adults and older ppl tell you what to do, or try and guide you through everything. If you give me a list, I promise you it will be done by dinner, and only when i'm done may you correct my work.
God put me in the city simply to test my perspective. my mind and body yearns for a rural area, but must cope with somethin less positive. Everyone gts that feeling about something at least once in their lfe. ALl of ths is why i envy those who grown up in the back country, and it's why i envy Marly. Marly is sooo down to earth and understands soo much! im so glad i met her. iim blessed with finding friends worthwhile